#text: daria

[laurynhayward]

text || @dariarutherford

Lauryn: i think i have to genuinely thank you, girl, because i'm minorly obsessed with the newest addition to your menu and it's been keeping me sane practically all week. Lauryn: i even had the idea of buying an extra one and giving it to one of the hospital's ruder patients the other day and it worked like a charm! hardly any complaints from him for the rest of my shift!

[jacksonrose]

text ✉️ jackson & daria

Jackson: so i just found out they put austin powers back on netflix. you know how long it's been since i've watched those movies? i'm thinking this needs to be a thing now because who doesn't love austin? watch party?

[riverjacksonx]

text 📲 river & daria

River: Okay, don't judge me too harshly for this one… I may or may not have binge-watched The Ultimatum in one sitting. It was like a train wreck I couldn't look away from!

[matt-schue]

Matt: Identical strangers?? You mean they were separated at birth and didn't know about the other's existence? Or are they not related?! Matt: Yellowjackets! It's crazy as a shit story, but damn, that show is GOOD! If you're into dark shows, I recommend watching it a whirl. Matt: Think my thing is not mixing them up by their looks but by their names, if that makes sense. I'll blank and be like, oh! That's Margot Robbie even though it's actually Jaime Pressly (while watching My Name is Earl or Not Another Teen Movie) Matt: What's your comfort sitcom? Talking about one you've seen countless times, can tune in randomly, and know the storyline within ten seconds. Matt: What did you wind up doing long Halloween? I kept at the station. We set up a spot in front of the truck and passed out candy. Full-size bars!😁 Matt: I'm bummed Halloween's gone. I like the lead-up to that holiday.

Daria: yeah, they definitely have some twin hijinks, especially since in their movie they're actually identical strangers. it's got a parent trap vibe, but with that unique twist on it for sure. Daria: wait... what were elijah wood and christina ricci in together? Daria: oh I don't mix them up usually.. just thought the old timey doppelgänger looked more like one than the other. though I can see the similarities in both their features, so I get why you'd get them mixed up. Daria: um, I like the romcom genre, hallmark movies are usually on during christmas season along with the classics for the holiday, comedy in general usually, depending on the type of comedy I guess. sitcoms, dramedy, that sort of thing I suppose. Daria: I haven't decided if I want to close early to hand out candy at home or keep the cafe open an hour later and just have a table of goodies for the kiddos for free. you three going trick or treating? I won't judge, personally I don't think there should be an age limit on it so long as you're having fun and not vandalizing the neighborhood, you know?

[uselessalexis165]

i’m being fed

[sicksadmayhem]

Daria and Jane dating would have been the best representation. The lesbians would be so powerful.

[ssecond-hand-faith]

Hi, I’m Daria. Go to hell

Cringetober Day Twenty Three: Adult Cartoon

It won’t work, my face is too expressive.

[charlierhodes]

Charlie: you actually nailed it on the vanilla, funny enough. call me basic or whatever, but it's just such a great scent. my favorite is the warm vanilla sugar from bath and body works. Charlie: Plus, vanilla's timeless. It's like the little black dress of scents—never goes out of style. Charlie: and thank you for the compliment! maybe i can work that sunshine comment in my bio -- though i think you might be a little biased considering i visit your cafe literally every day for my daily caffeine intake Charlie: speaking of, congrats on the rebrand! how's that going for you?

Daria: you smell like pine needles and you have a face like sunshine! Daria: okay maybe not the first part, you're probably more of a vanilla scent if I had to guess, I've never taken the time to smell you when you're in. but you do have a face like sunshine that can light up a room!

[liquidstar]

and now for something stupid

[dailycrippledcharacters]

Duke (Vampair)

[Image Description: From the official web series. Duke, a male vampire with white skin and red eyes. He has a black beard. He is wearing a black hat and cape and a gray shirt. His ears and nose are pointed. He is glaring down at an envelope in his hand. The drawing is in black and white. End ID.]

Duke is an amputee.

[nick-duval]

text 💪 @dariarutherford

Nick: Out of curiosity, do you need an extra pair of hands or anything for the cafe reno? I’m shit at interior design, but I can haul furniture with the best of ‘em, feel free to put me to work, 🫡

[dariarutherford]

Daria: I think that depends on if you can find a place open for them to pick up the food. also pretty sure it's like against policy for them to go in your house Daria: too bad you don't have like a drone they could hook it to and then you could fly it up through your window. or just open your window and have the instructions be for them to throw it in your window? Daria: idk.. I own a lot of blankets Daria: girl you know i'm always there with an ego boost for anyone who needs one

Lottie: Booo. Fine. I get it. I guess.

Lottie: I wonder if I can UberEats myself something to eat, and just have them bring it to my bed so I don’t have to get up. 👀😂

Lottie: Why’s your bed look comfier than mine, though? 😭

Lottie: You best not stop flirting with me. A girl needs an ego boost from time to time.

[jollyrogergay]

you’ve heard of “so long, gay bowser,” but get ready for,

[holdoncallfailed]

tbh as an adult daria herself is borderline intolerable but i love jane sooooo much that i can deal with it

[shyjusticewarrior]

DC Comics Incorrect Quotes Pt 74

Harley: I hate being an academic, they're making me write shit. I thought I was just supposed to sit in an old chair, smoke, and say something French every now and then.

Selina, reading a magazine: "Thin thighs for yor man." But I don't like men with thin thighs.

Damian: And Brown?

Steph: Yeah?

Damian: About this whole "am I pretty" thing- which I still think is stupid- but I just wanna say, I like looking at you.

Damian: I think, you know, your face holes are in really good spots. And if you're not pretty, then I don't know what is.

Steph: Thanks, Damian.

[djdomberry]

Dom: exactly! see, you get it. i mean, i'll admit there's always been a nagging voice in my head that wonders if i just passed up on the right person every time things seem like they're getting serious with someone and i freak out, which usually leads to us breaking up, but like... damn it! i said i wasn't gonna go into it! Dom: get it, girl! get on out there and get yourself someone to spend the big day with! honestly wouldn't mind that myself since i have been single for a while. Dom: don't tempt me! i would absolutely do it and be your wingman if you really wanted me to. i got you, d!

Daria: okay I'll let it go then, that makes sense. live your life while you can and play the field a bit to make sure that when you settle down it's the right person. Daria: yeah I think I gotta blame the big holiday coming up tbh. valentine's is my favorite and it'd be nice to have someone to spend it with. maybe just maybe I'll work a little more at putting myself, get myself a lil something something to snuggle up with. Daria: glad I have you as my own personal hypeman then 😜 wanna come hang around the cafe to help me get that valentine's date? loljk